My first time …

Well, new as this is to me it seems that really it is just like sending off an e-mail flashing from my space to yours. I am in this dream of hues of beige and polyester purple foam dancing in graves of lost ocean's water ever changing against the rocks of sliding cuts and hopeful lust. Perhaps I have nothing to say as I find myself in existential angst yet again having just returned from a lovely holiday of reconnection to myself and the natural world around me only to return to the concrete steps of melted car tar and the flourescent lights drilling into my skull from above.

In the 3 days of re-integrating myself into the corporate drone, I find myself fighting a losing battle of retaining my connectivity and losing my soul or disconnecting and retaining part of my soul. Either way, I feel as though I am lost and lament the cost of life and the inability for me to lay in a field surrounding by paper, canvas and the colours of earth.

I am sure that I will discover some sort of compromise within myself to allow me to continue working in joy and understanding that it is only a means to an end and not an end in and of itself ... yes, I will find that and in the meantime my spirits have been lifted in the lovely painting I discovered today and the lovely print peering out at me "Silent Majority" sends happy smiles through my soul and the joy of Elvis Costello tonight and my lovely Duke ... the small things in life are the best things in life ...